You come into the job eagerly, with high expectations, perhaps a degree or two behind you, or perhaps with some years of experience under your belt. Your interviews had gone very well, and you look forward to making a big difference together with your new co-workers and managers. Yes, this is your dream job!

Six months down the road, you find yourself dragging your feet to work. What had started out as a dream job is now more of a nightmare. You have suggested, perhaps even started, on a few initiatives that you thought would make life better for everyone at your workplace, but you were surprised at the resistance and cynicism you encountered. And yet, you were quite sure that you had talked to more than a few people about the changes you proposed, and they had all seemed supportive of your ideas. Yet they were the ones who resisted the most, and now your manager has just given you a rather critical review of your first six months on the job. What happened?

Well, did you try to understand your primary job in the context of your work environment first? If you weren’t sure about the “whys” of work flows and processes, did you take the time to find out? Did you take the time to get to know your co-workers and your managers as people first, not just as co-workers and managers? Did you first demonstrate high competency in your work within the context of how your organization preferred that same work to be done? Remember the Golden Rule and the Platinum Rule? You might have fulfilled the Golden Rule, but forgotten all about the Platinum Rule. People have to come to trust you first before they’ll even think about changing what could have been long-established ways of working just because you suggested it. Now, your suggestion could have been the panacea to end all ills, but no one will take it if they haven’t trusted you enough yet. They have to come to like you enough so that they are comfortable placing their bets on you, so to speak.

Facing issues at work? Try establishing good relationships first. And if people still don’t like you, try changing something about yourself for the better, or it may be time to move someplace else.